I guess that my blog loyal readers already know a good part of my character. I always preach about peace and forgiveness. I admire Jesus Christ as a person for his message of love. I adore Ghandi for leading his nation in a peaceful matter to achieve their independence. I don’t like an eye for an eye, and I support turning the other cheek (in a strength matter).
Things are easy said than done. It bothers me that at a personal level I find my ego preventing me from doing what I preach for. I call for peace at a national level while I find myself weak to forget about a silly behaviour of a friend.
I do forgive, but I find it hard to forget. When I am offended, I try to avoid offending back, but I also find it difficult to initiate any kind of peaceful initiative. One has to be so strong in order to turn the other cheeck. Stronger than his own ego.
Instead, I usually, and in order not to make a war, keep some distance. I ignore. I hold my feelings. I become cold. I wait for an initiative from the other side. Mainly because I don’t feel myself mistaken. It is a red line for my ego. To my pride. No matter what I would lose in the process. Even friendship, which I value the most.
I didn’t think that I would be posting anything this week, but a friend’s post triggered me to write. I find it funny that he mostly post when we fight. I am not sure how many of you have gone into trouble because of his blog. I know that a blog is a personal space for its owner, but it is also a public space as well. When I mention someone in my blog, does that mean it is my way of sending an indirect message to him?
Can blogging be a mean of sending a message to someone that you prefer not to confront face to face?
How many of you find it bothering when your personal stuff is posted on a public blog? Sometimes it doesn’t have to mention you by name. Most of the blog readers won’t realize who the person’s posting are talking about, but you know that he is talking about you. He is making a discussion about your personal issue with public. While you stand there reading what he wrote, trying to ignore what you think is wrong in what he said, and holding yourself from engaging in the discussion because you just don’t want to make the situation any worse.
Absolutely true, sometimes, you really want to get a message across without confronting or engaging in a discussion.
Sometimes you find something that the whole society suffers from.
“Can blogging be a mean of sending a message to someone that you prefer not to confront face to face?”
Yes, and there is nothing wrong with it at all. sometimes you just need to vent out those feelings that are inside no matter if they are right or wrong you just need to get them out of your system. i feel like feelings are feelings you have them sometimes they are hard to control even when you know they are wrong. i recently had to accept the fact that the guy i am datting doesn’t love me! i can’t control his feelings all i know is that i love him and he doesn’t love me. well can’t get mad at him for telling me how he feels its his feelings. its life 🙂 so i smile move on and i still love him.
love peace and light
ps love your bloggs
it’s not his right to write about it , it’s a privet matter and he should’ve talked to you about it , not BLOG about it , now you can just ignore him (turn the other cheek) or blog back
qwaider, you said,
“Sometimes you find something that the whole society suffers from.” I didnt get what you mean 🙂
Average-moh, I guess that I have blogged back, but in a different way 😉
I understand what you are saying. I guess that there are other means of expressing feelings rather than blog about it.
I wish everyone has your wisdom. Your love for the guy you were dating is unselfish. You knew when to set him free and still can love him. He is a fool not to love you back 🙂
Fadi .. you know what ?! I hateeeeeee reading a msg directed to me on a blog ! why dont you tell me anything face to face ?! Actually its not that I dont want people to know about my personal issues (i dont care) but I dont like using indeirect ways to say something to some one , specially if he/she is close to you.
khalas ta3a 2olly 1..2…3 .. its not a big deal sa7 ?!
leh ana bayneh m3assebh hon heheh ?! 🙂
u have been tagged, check my blog 😉
also tagged =D
I don’t think there is anything wrong to post a personal problem as a blog entry as long as your are respecting other people’s privacy by not mentioning personally-identifiable information.
But is it healthy for the relationship of those two people? The answer isn’t simple, and we might identify numerous cases where this kind of behavior is in fact healthy. But, in your case it doesn’t seem entirely healthy, as it is obvious to reasonable extents that you have been irritated by the behavior, which implies that there is a problem that needs to be resolved.
I guess there is not much that little honesty cannot resolve, but that depends on the specifics of the relationship and how you perceive that relationship.
7ala, your comment sounded like you are the person I am talkingabout :). I agree with you. Communication directly is better.
Manal Yousef, I visied your blog and read the tag. I am not sure what I have to do. Shall I pick a song I like and write about. Please explain.
Tala, thanks for the tag. I will do my job soon 🙂
Devil’s mind, I guess that what irritates me is the way it has been posted. He didn’t mention names, he didn’treally post the problem, he just insulted me by saying that he realized how people can be silly and act childlish in reference to me.
Hi Observer! I’d continue in Jesus’ teachings from Matthew 18, if someone offends you, you go to them first, no where else (like a blog). If it is a matter of sin (even gossip) and they don’t apologize, you go with someone else who knows you both so neither feels attacked, but can straighten out the misunderstanding. It’s usually that, or a misreading of intention 75% of the time. Itf they still don’t respond, go to a person in authority…and if they don’t respond, than you need to keep your distance until they become a more worthy friend.
The whole idea is always reconciliation, not broadcasting or venting feelings. In my opinion, there is a time to vent, as long as it can be finished, as the venting of anger and hurt finds NO end. And venting shouldn’t be vindictive, but with someone who can not hold your grudge against the other.
If people continue in poor patterns of communication, and cannot act in a manner worthy of trust, then the relationship can only stay at the level where trust can be maintained.
I like St. Paul’s definition of love from 1st Cor. 13 “Love doesn’t keep a record of wrongs”. Not that you forget what someone has done, but it is not held against them.
Hope that is helpful, and may God help your friendship restore.
Do you mean literally “turn the other cheek”? Do you really believe Jesus meant us to take his words _literally_ ?
If I come to your office and slap you, or I come to your church and slap your priest, would you folks “turn the other cheek”?
Even U.S. President George W Bush, who is a conservative Christian did not turn the other cheek when Islamists struck America on 9/11. He declared a Crusade and then gave the whole world 2 choices: “Either you are FOR US or AGAINST US”, which he was quoting Jesus our Lord words in the Gospels.
He retalitated and invaded Islamic Afganistan on October 2001 and Islamic Iraq on March 2004 and on 2006 he gave tacit support to the Ethiopians, sent them weapons and directed them to invade Islamic Somalia.
The Arab Observer,
Can you tell me what non Muslim religions are legal in Jordan? I mean non Muslim religions other than the Christian religion. For example, Sikhs, Buddhists, Chinese and Jews?
Do you have any Jewish synagogue in Jordan? I’m coming to Amman, Jordan next month for a business conference and may need to worship in a synagogue for the Sabbath.
Kiniz, thanks for the advice and sorry for my late reply. I guess that you are right. Maybe if the situation is different I would have behaved different. It has been sometime now for what happened. I guess that it is over for our frienship. Maybe it is for the best.
Haydar Aliyev, from my perspective, I don’t see George bush as a true follower of Jesus teachings. His actions may represent a certain church teachings, but it is in no way in the same line of the spirit of Jesus teachings.
He totally quote Jesus in the wrong context “Either you are FOR US or AGAINST US”.
Anonymous, in Jordan we have the freedom of belief. There is no restriction on what you believe in in terms of law unless your belief can cause harm.
You may need to be caution in declaring your Jewish faith as most people here do carry good amount of bitterness and hatred towards Jews.
I don’t think that we have any synagogue for Jews. I haven’t heard about that before and I don’t think that people would let it happen here.
Hope that would help you.
Do you know any good web sites giving information on how to register a religious organisation or society in Jordan?
I am doing a research for a university project on various countries’ procedure to register a society.
Thank you for your time!
I am sorry Karaki, I am afraid that I dont have any idea of that.