How good can one build a perception about his own self? To know his stand among the group of people he belongs to, his abilities, others perceptions about him, his social level, character, how much he is loved, how intellectual he is, his smartness, …etc
Reading the expressions of the other people we are dealing be is part of creating our own self esteem. Comparison is our main way of forming a perception. We always compare others to ourselves, even subconsiously.
Unfortunatly, not all of us are good in the perception game. There are things in us that others can see better than we do. Sometimes we think that we have a good sense of humar because we have managed to get a laugh or so from someone, but in reality we don’t realize that it was a fake laugh because people are cunning. They can fake their face expressions, showing something totally different than what is really in their heart. One has to be so good in order to read things right.
In other times, someone self esteem would be crashed based on just one other person’s perception of him. It can be an awful feeling, knowing that what you thought yourself to be is not what it really is because someone you respect and trust just told you so. When your confidence with your cabailities of perception isn’t strong enough, you would believe one other person’s wrong perception over yours.
For me, I usually have more confidence in myself than others, but I have been wrong at times which taught me to consult more than a person to form an opinion about myself. I am not always right, and others are not always right either. What matters is to know the truth and make peace with it.
This reminds me when I have heard for the first time about my large nose. This is funny, cause back then I was 20 years old, and has always believed that I have a normal good looking nose. Yes, I used to look in the mirror! But sometimes you don’t see right cause the mirror doesn’t give you all the angles. A side profile give a better indication, which other people see better than me.
My parents have never mentioned anything about my nose! Nothing! Thanks to my best friend, and while we were teasing each other, he laughed at my big nose. For instant, I laughed at him. I thought that he is totally far away from truth this time. But he laughed back, then he swore, then he asked me if I ever look in the mirror, then he asked me to ask other people.
I realized that I have been living with a big nose for years without noticing it. It doesn’t really bother me as it is just a nose. People say it isn’t that bad. I can’t see how bad it is. But it makes me wonder about what other things that I got it wrong about myself?
Maybe it doesn’t matter as long as I feel peace inside. I just hope that I am not far away of the truth, and if I am, then I wonder whether it is better to know that or not.
The weeping prophet Jeremiah said “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked, who can know it?”.>>I think human beings are masters of self-deception. When we look at who we really are internally, with our carefully constructed masks off, we cring at what we find. But looking at it, acknowledging it, and asking God for help is the courageous first step, as King David wrote “Search me, oh God, and know my heart, try me and know my anxieties; and see if there is any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way of everlasting”>>Great analogy about the nose. But your friend is wrong, your nose is in perfect proportion to your face. 🙂 Just like your mom told you!
Thanks kinzi, I will tell him that next time he teases me about my nose 😛>>I like the qoute of king David 🙂
Me too, it is from one of my favorite Psalms (you call it Zaboor?)number 139. It is written after David’s murderous affair with Bathsheba, which reveals the amazing compassion of a loving God who runs to forgive us when we admit blowing it.
I know how you look like. I never thought you had a big nose, but now you have pointed it out, I can’t see you without this gigantic ugly nose. >>You see?! We tend to amplify negatives and exaggerate them.